Thursday, May 28, 2009

Joy - I'm Failing

This week is the "joy" week of the Fruit of the Spirit Challenge (Galatians 5:22-23). I'm failing at it. I've laughed this week, but haven't experienced "joy." I've been happy this week. Satisfied. Contented. But joy? No.

This revelation led me to examine the meaning of the word "joy." Even reading the definitions, both verb and noun, hasn't helped me feel better about my progress this week. I'm satisfied, but my heart isn't full of glee and I'm not delighted and I'm not experiencing a state of felicity. What a bummer.

What am I doing wrong? Am I not lighthearted enough? Do I take things too seriously? Is it okay to simply be content and satisfied and pleased? Is joy something I must experience daily? What level of joy?

The concordance in my Bible wasn't particularly helpful. I wanted a chart or something. The best explanation is Paul saying in Philippians 4:4-5 "Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all."

Well, good grief. I can't sustain joy all the time. I just can't. I know God loves me. I'm practicing gentleness - or at least I attempt it. I'm a mom. How can I not be gentle? But do I have to be in a state of cartwheels and rainbows all the time?

This requires more thought. More later.

By the way, thought I'd let it be known "Jon and Kate Plus 8" has been removed from my DVR series recordings. I can't do it anymore. The season 5 premiere hurt my heart too much. Their train will have to wreck or right itself without my visual attention. Shame on all involved for keeping the cameras rolling. And I'm most bent out of shape about everyone attacking Kate. She's only half of Jon and Kate. What about blasting Jon, too? Better yet, back off and leave them both alone. And Jon and Kate? Please finish your contract and close your doors and be a family. Please. Still praying for you. Much love, Jen

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