Tuesday, July 27, 2010

I Told You So

You know those moments in life when the people you love learn the truth of what you say?  Sometimes it is a  struggle to not scream or chant or sashay around the room while singing "I told you so!"

Right now my "I told you so" moment is with a friend who has two small kids.  She has an older child and two smaller ones.  When my three visited her house and I marveled all her pricey knick-knacks sitting eye-level with the toddlers, she said it was just a matter of telling them "no."  Seriously?  This came from the woman with an 8 year old, a small toddler and an infant.  Now that the infant is a toddler and that toddler is a preschooler, those pricey knick-knacks are getting destroyed and her "no" isn't just enough.  Ha.  It's called "lockdown" on anything of value.  I told you so.

Whew.  Glad I got that off my chest.

I recognize that "I told you so" works both ways and my older mom friends have lots of valuable information to impart.  Some of it I take gladly, some of it with a grain of salt, some of it I ignore and then allow them the "I told you so" moment when I tell them they were right.  See?  I'm perfect.

While I'm here - and we know it's been awhile since I've been here - let me tell you how rough and tiring this summer has been.  Several friends have passed away.  Four, to be exact.  Cancer, fluke, cancer, and cancer.  My heart feels a little battered.

Throw in I'm now working at home and it's not something I can do while the kids are awake.  What was I thinking?  I was thinking we needed the extra money and I'd figure it out eventually.  Somehow that's not working as well as it was supposed to work.  On top of that - we got a dog.  What was I thinking?  I was thinking the kids and hubby have asked for a dog for years and it was time to relent when a friend offered us an older puppy.  Needless to say, I'm tired.  I'm worn out.  I'm constantly struggling to get it together.

I totally didn't listen to the older moms in my life who warned I already had enough on my plate with being a SAHM to three.  Without the WAHM job.  Without the dog.

Now you know why I'm relishing the "I told you so."  Sometimes it just feels satisfying to be right about something.

Of course, I was right about Obama, but that goes without saying and is such a consistent "I told you so" that it doesn't really count.  Maybe it would feel more satisfying if he weren't wrecking our country.  But, that's another post altogether.

~ G

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Sarah Palin Addresses Racist Charge

Just in case you aren't on Facebook and just in case you aren't a Facebook friend of Sarah Palin, here is her response to the NAACP's recent charge that the Tea Party is racist:


The Charge of Racism: It’s Time to Bury the Divisive Politics of the Past
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I am saddened by the NAACP’s claim that patriotic Americans who stand up for the United States of America’s Constitutional rights are somehow “racists.” The charge that Tea Party Americans judge people by the color of their skin is false, appalling, and is a regressive and diversionary tactic to change the subject at hand.

President Reagan called America’s past racism “a legacy of evil” against which we have seen the long struggle of minority citizens for equal rights. He condemned any sort of racism, as all good and decent people do today. He also called it a “point of pride for all Americans” that as a nation, we have successfully struggled to overcome this evil. Reagan rightly declared that “there is no room for racism, anti-Semitism, or other forms of ethnic and racial hatred in this country,” and he warned that we must never go back to the racism of our past.

His words rang especially true in the immediate aftermath of the 2008 presidential election. It seemed that with the election of our first black president, our country had become a new “post-racial” society. As one writer in the Washington Post stated: “[Barack Obama’s] election isn’t just about a black president. It’s about a new America. The days of confrontational identity politics have come to an end.”

We, as a united people, applauded that sentiment. We were proud of that progress. That’s why it is so sad to see that 18 months later, the NAACP is once again using the divisive language of the past to unfairly accuse the Tea Party movement of harboring “racist elements.”

Having been on the receiving end of a similar spurious charge of racism (in a recent frivolous lawsuit which was finally dismissed by a federal judge), I know how Tea Party Americans feel to be falsely accused. To be unjustly accused of association with what Reagan so aptly called that “legacy of evil” is a traumatizing experience, and one of which the honest, freedom-loving patriots of the Tea Party movement are truly undeserving.

On this subject, I can recommend the statement issued by a man I was proud to endorse, Tim Scott, the GOP candidate from South Carolina’s First Congressional District. Tim, poised to become the first African-American Republican Congressman from the former Confederacy since Reconstruction, is himself a sign of a hopeful, truly post-racial future for our country. It gives added meaning to his warning that “the NAACP is making a grave mistake in stereotyping a diverse group of Americans who care deeply about their country and who contribute their time, energy and resources to make a difference.”

The only purpose of such an unfair accusation of racism is to dissuade good Americans from joining the Tea Party movement or listening to the common sense message of Tea Party Americans who simply want government to abide by our Constitution, live within its means, and not borrow and spend away our children’s futures. Red and yellow, black and white, this message is precious in all our sights. All decent Americans abhor racism. No one wants to be associated with any organization that is in any way racist in sentiment or origin. I certainly don’t want to be. Thankfully, the Tea Party movement is not racist or motivated by racism. It is motivated by love of country and all that is good and honest about our proud and diverse nation.

Like President Reagan, Tea Party Americans believe that “the glory of this land has been its capacity for transcending the moral evils of our past.” Isn’t it time we put aside the divisive politics of the past once and for all and celebrate the fact that neither race nor gender is any longer a barrier to achieving success in America – even in achieving the highest office in the land?

I just spent a few beautiful Alaskan days with some beautiful Americans in my husband’s birthplace – they are Todd’s family and they are Yupik Eskimo. In the decades that our families have blended, I have never heard one proud, patriotic member judge another member based on skin color. Both Todd and I were raised to measure a person according to their capacity and willingness to love, work, forgive, contribute, and show good character. We’re joined by the vast majority of Americans in this belief whereby we measure a man by his character, not his color. Because of amazing efforts and accomplishments by those who came before my generation, it is foreign to us to consider condemning or condoning anyone’s actions based on race or gender. Being with our diverse family in a melting pot that is a Native village just days ago reminded me of that.

So to leave that remote village and return back to “modern civilization” only to hear of the NAACP’s resolution today suggesting that we Tea Party Americans don’t respect equality makes me sad for those who choose to divide these great United States. It is time to end the divisive politics.

- Sarah Palin

Friday, July 9, 2010

Preparation

I've been thinking a lot lately about how God prepares us.  It does sound trite, doesn't it?  It does sound simplistic, too.  Sounding like a drippy greeting card doesn't change it from being true.

2005 was a bitterly rough and emotional year for me.  I miscarried twice that year.  We wanted both babies, yet neither made it past the 8th week gestation.  My body didn't cooperate in the aftermath and by year's end, I had undergone three D&Cs.  I grieved.  I grieved hard.  Yes, people said unwittingly stupid things to me.  Hey, we all say stupid things when we don't know what to say.  I took my time and owned my grief, not pitching a tent in the valley of the shadow of death, but methodically placing one foot in front of the other.

As wretched and tear-filled as those days were, God taught me how to deal.  He taught me how to face pain and not fear pain.  He taught me how to sit with someone in pain and how best to anticipate their needs.  Through the nearly-unbearable pain I experienced, He taught me how to be available to others experiencing nearly-unbearable pain.

He's since put that knowledge to use.  The Christmas after my last miscarriage, a friend lost her son through a freak accident.  I remember struggling over what to write to her, but the words were too jumbled in my head to make it onto paper with any semblance of coherency.  I called her.  We talked and talked and she was the first person to say, "you're the only one who gets this."  Thank you, God.

The most recent experience has been with my friend who lost her husband two weeks ago.  We've been friends for thirteen years and her loss hurts Darling and me deeply.  We miss him, too.  But God has strengthened me.  He's given me the ability to hurt deeply with someone and not back away from the fierceness of her pain.  He's given me the words and authority of experience to say it's okay to grieve and it takes time.  He's given me the comprehension that all emotions are equal and how we come to them might differ, but grief is grief and joy is joy.

I am not saying all of this to set myself on high as the Queen of the Grieving or to say I know this lesson better than someone else.  I'm...  I'm thankful.  I'm thankful God took our nightmare and used it within me to comfort His children.  I'm not a saint.  (Hey, I've already told you I can curse like a sailor).  I'm ungrateful more often than I care to admit.  Really, sometimes I'm just a mess.

God didn't make me lose those babies.  We live in a fallen world.  There was something wrong with our babies and they weren't able to live and they now wait for us in Heaven.  But God didn't make them die.  God didn't make me suffer just so He could teach me a lesson.  What He did do was hold me close during my pain and give me the grace to grieve deeply without losing my mind or marriage or family.

Make no mistake: I'm not saying I didn't hurl some (sailor-like) choice words at Our Lord and Savior.  I'm not saying I didn't behave like a heartbroken child wailing and railing at her parent.  I walked through the valley of the shadow of death and came out on the other side.  I am saying God didn't let my pain go to waste.  He used my experience to give me a heart for others in pain.

So I say this to you, my readers who struggle: God isn't doing this to you, but He will not let this hell-on-earth experience go to waste.  Eventually, someday, you'll be able to give thanks for your hard-earned knowledge.

~G

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